1. A three-legged dog walks into a saloon in the Old West. He slides up to the bar and announces: ''I'm looking for the man who shot my paw.''
2. I tried water polo but my horse drowned.
3. I'll tell you what I love doing more than anything: trying to pack myself in a small suitcase. I can hardly contain myself.
4. So I met this gangster who pulls up the back of people's pants, it was Wedgie Kray.
5. Went to the corner shop - bought 4 corners.
6. A seal walks into a club...
7. I went to the Doctors the other day, and he said, 'Go to Bournemouth, it's great for flu'. So I went - and I got it.
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